41 Weeks … The Stork is Late

41 weeks belly pic.

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The last video available for info on baby’s progress.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJ3KkPxaebA&w=400&h=330]
I guess the membrane sweep didn’t work.  The mild cramps and tightness I was feeling went away.  Drinking the red raspberry leaf tea hasn’t caused any contractions either.Tomorrow is another baby check-up.  I’ll have another cervical exam done, and blood pressure check.  I will give them my 24 hour urine sample.  I believe I will be having another non-stress test done.  I’m not sure if I’ll be having another ultrasound done.I have been checking my blood pressure at home all day today and it’s been fairly good all day long.  120’s/70’s up to 130’s/70’s.  Not too bad.  At least it’s been under 140/90, which is the number when doctors start getting worried.

I have a sinking feeling that I will have no choice but to schedule an induction.  I am a week overdue now, with pregnancy induced hypertension.  I don’t see the doctors allowing me to wait another week (which I gladly will do if they would just let me…)

I just hope that the doctor will allow me to at least schedule an induction for Monday morning, instead of tomorrow night.  The doctor we like isn’t on call tomorrow night, but she will be on call Monday and Tuesday.

I’m scared.  I have read about so many complications that start with a forced labor.

Pitocin side effects and risks

Pitocin Induction

I wouldn’t be as worried with an induction if I were having a smaller baby that could be delivered more easily, and if this weren’t my first baby at 36 years of age, and if I had lower blood pressure, but all of these issues I believe could increase complications for me with a forced labor.  Inductions are hard enough on a young woman’s body who is healthy with no blood pressure issues, and may be having a normal 6 to 7 pound baby… but I don’t fall into this category.

Baby Faith will probably be around 9 pounds.  I’m 36 years old with hypertension.  This is my very first pregnancy, and my body isn’t being given the opportunity to naturally begin labor on its own.  I feel like my joy has been stolen from me.  This is the time I should be excited with anticipation, and waiting to feel my body start labor on its own.  I’ve been dreaming of the day to know what that feels like.  Now, I just feel like a vessel that is holding a baby until the doctor take control.  They will plan her birth-date, and they will be in control of what my body does.  I feel like I’m already sitting in a waiting room, getting ready for the doctors to take over … instead of happily getting ready for my body to bring my baby into this world.

I know I have to leave this in God’s hands … but fear is taking over, and I’m struggling to find peace.  I wanted to be a happy and excited first time mother, but that has been taken from me.  I know the doctors have our best interests at heart, but I feel like they have invaded my space, and my mind, and stolen my opportunity for a true birth experience.  Everything will be orchestrated by the doctors and hospital policies when induction takes place.  Will this feel like a real birth experience?  I believe the only thing I will care to look back on when Faith is born is holding her in my arms.

I am thankful for my loving husband, who is going through this stress as well, but still tries to comfort me and put a smile on my face.  I love you Aaron ♥  I’m thankful for my friends and family that are praying for us.

We can all still pray for a miraculous natural birth that could happen at the last minute, but I’m losing hope.

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Baby Check-Up

I want to first say thank you to everyone that has been reading my blog, and posting supportive messages on my Facebook page as well.  Thank you also to my new readers that have sent me a message or left me a comment introducing themselves, and sharing words of encouragement.  I really appreciate it, and I’m glad to have virtually met you. ♥

I rescheduled my baby check-up today for a different time.  The previous day I was monitoring my blood pressure at home, and I noticed that it was at its lowest right around noon time (it was at its highest in the early morning, and evening.)  I was fortunate to be able to reschedule for 1:30 today instead of 8 am this morning.  This proved to be a good decision.

I did get a lower blood pressure reading at the doctor’s office. It was 138/74.  It was under that dangerous number of 140/90, so I felt better.  My urine test came back fine.  My non-stress test came back fine.  Nothing out of the normal.  Baby’s heartbeat was strong, and her movements were good.  My Braxton Hicks contractions were pretty random this time.  There was nothing that showed distress with the baby or with myself.  Oh, and I lost 5 pounds.  I weighed 166 at my last check-up 2 days ago, and now I weigh 161.  I think the weight loss is caused by a mixture of stress (when I’m stressed I have no appetite) and I also cut out all sodium.  No frozen dinners, no canned vegetables, no meat, and no coffee.  Just fresh fruit and veggies, rice, and lots of water.  I am trying very hard to keep my blood pressure down, and in the process I lost 5 pounds of water weight by cutting out so much sodium in my diet.

I met with a different OB doctor today.  I’ve seen her only once before earlier in my pregnancy.   She really eased my nerves, and thoroughly talked with me in a much more personal and attentive way than the other doctors that I usually see.  One of the first things she said was, “I always prefer a natural start to labor…”   She immediately put me at ease.  She’s such a cute little doctor lol,  in her 40’s or early 50’s, really short with dark longish hair, dark glasses and a happy smile.  She explained to me why she thinks the other doctors have been pushing for induction.  She said that since my blood pressure is near the edge of concern (140/90) I could be at risk for placental abruption.  High blood pressure could cause the placenta to detach from the uterus wall causing hemorrhaging, and depriving the baby of oxygen and nutrients.   It can be a dangerous complication, and can happen suddenly.  She said that my blood pressure should normally be 120/80 or lower.  If it was around that number, induction would not be an issue at all.  She also said that since I don’t smoke, and have not had chronic hypertension in the past, she is not too worried yet, although she is concerned.

She then went ahead and did a cervical exam on me.  I am now 2 centimeters dilated, 70 to 80% effaced, and baby’s head is engaged at a -2 station.  A slight improvement!  Yay!  I then asked her if she could sweep my membranes, and she did.  This can help start labor.  I was expecting it to hurt, but I didn’t feel any pain.  And now, I am feeling crampy :)   I do believe I am having mild contractions.  I just hope and pray they continue at a steady pace!   Sweeping the membranes may or may not start labor, but at least it’s something that is done naturally which will allow my body to respond in its own way.

I asked her more questions about Cervidil and Pitocin.  She said that since I am already slightly dilated, and mostly effaced,  I am a good candidate for going into labor just with the Cervidil alone.  Cervidil is mainly used to ripen and dilate my cervix in order to prepare it for contractions once Pitocin is administered,  but sometimes the dilation and effacement caused by Cervidil will get labor started all on its own, so I may not even need Pitocin.  This is a great relief to me because Cervidil (from what I’ve read) initially starts with milder gradual contractions (if it causes contractions at all.)  I think I will be less nervous about being induced with Cervidil than with Pitocin.  However, she said, “Contrary to popular belief, Pitocin does gradually cause contractions.”  She made it sound like if I needed Pitocin, I will have a window of time to prepare myself for the stronger contractions that Pitocin will cause.  Of course, I’m still nervous about being induced, and I still want to avoid it completely … but she did ease my nerves just a little bit more.  She also said that in her experience she has seen raspberry leaf tea help start contractions.  So I’m sitting here drinking some right now.

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Since the placenta is working perfect, baby is not in distress, I’m not in distress, and she knows that I’m really wanting to avoid induction … she said I can wait a little longer :)   I have to do another 24-hour urine test to make sure no protein is in my urine, and there’s no sign of preeclampsia.   If I don’t go into labor before Friday,  I will meet with one of the male doctors I see regularly.  We expect to be pressured by the doctor to have an induction, but I will ask him if he can sweep my membranes again, and see if he will allow the induction to be scheduled for Monday if another membrane sweep doesn’t work before then.  Why Monday?  Because the lovely doctor we just met with today is on call Monday and Tuesday :)  The reason I like her so much is because she didn’t make us feel we had no control over these decisions.  She didn’t pressure induction.  She only suggested it.  I can tell she really wants to honor my wishes if at all possible.  Of course, if I see her on Monday at the hospital, that means I’m there for an induction, and I will begin with Cervidil, and hope that labor will start with that alone.  I am hoping and praying my labor can continue on its own after Cervidil is placed in my cervix.  Praying for no Pitocin, epidural, or c-section.It just so happens that Monday is our first year anniversary ♥   Not the best way to celebrate; in a hospital … but we will be together, and if labor progresses fast … then Faith may arrive that very day (if she doesn’t decide to make her appearance before then.)  As always, it’s in God’s hands, and according to His plan.

Tomorrow I will be posting my 41 weeks baby update!  Unless she comes tonight.  I am already working hard on that :)

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtrG3nrird4&w=400&h=330]
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Baby Check-up

Well, I no longer feel in control.  I don’t know what to do.  Feeling hopeless, and very frustrated due to my lack of knowledge concerning all of the pregnancy complications that could very well happen to me now.

The doctor wants me to go to the hospital tonight.  I said no, and I scheduled another baby check-up two days from now, but I am wondering if I made the right decision.  I went in for another routine urine sample, blood pressure check, weight check, cervical exam, non-stress test, and ultrasound on baby Faith.  Everything looks great except that my blood pressure was 140/83.

My BP is going back up a bit, but everything else was fine.  I weigh 166.  Urine sample came back fine.  Ultrasound was great.  I got a cute little picture of Faith’s ear (which, by the way, looks just like Aaron’s ear.)  I have attached earlobes, and Aaron has detached earlobes.  Faith has Daddy’s earlobes.  Big surprise.  She is Daddy’s little girl, like I’ve always said :)

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The non-stress test was great; baby’s heartbeat is strong, and her movements were frequent.  However, I’m having no contractions.   The doctor said I am 1 1/2 centimeters dilated, and 70% effaced.  No big change for weeks now, and since my BP is climbing up again… he wants to induce.He said he would like me to go to the hospital tonight and have a medication called Cervidil applied to my cervix to help me dilate and efface more.  I would stay overnight and be monitored.  The next morning they would start Pitocin, and I may deliver in the afternoon sometime.  He then told me that I would be at a higher risk for a c-section; around 30% compared to 10 to 15% if I were to just go into labor on my own.  What if my cervix is still not ready for birth after the Cervidil is applied?  Sometimes Cervidil doesn’t work.  And what will happen when the Pitocin triggers strong contractions, but my cervix may not be ready for birth yet?  I would be in for a long hard forced-labor, which in turn would pose the inevitable possibility of an epidural and c-section.

Although the baby is not in distress, the placenta is still working perfect, and my tests are all ok … I’m being told that my blood pressure is still a concern, and that as more time passes it can just get worse.   It sounds like my inducement is for preventative reasons, instead of a medical emergency.  I’m indecisive on what to do, and I’m extremely upset about this.  I’m feeling defeated already, and labor hasn’t even begun.

Part of me thinks I should just go to the hospital tonight because if I wait 2 more days for the next baby check-up only to find out that I’m still not progressing, then I’ve wasted 2 days stressing over this and most likely having my blood pressure rise even more due to anxiety.

I’m just sitting here.  Please help me pray for answers.